My Apology

            Hey guys, So I want to start this off with saying I'm so sorry for being spotty on here and on my youtube as well. When I first started this blog I believe i was pregnant with my now 2 1/2 year old. I wanted to have a place to express myself on whatever I believed. To share real honest reviews, and just talk about things that others can relate to. In no way is this supposed to be a negative post so please keep reading.

              First I want to state that sometimes your dreams look so far away, but that doesn't mean quit. Sometimes things just need to be put on hold for a little bit. Sometimes life and the unexpected happen, but you can't help that.This is what I've had to do on and off the last couple of years, and there has just been so much going on. There wasn't enough time i felt to even relax before having to go to sleep for the next day. Now things finally feel like they're calming down, and that i have a moment to breathe, to gather my thoughts together.

          So with that I want to take a moment and tell you guys whats been going on for the last year, and why I haven't been very bubbly or open with anything. Anyone who knows me I'm not one to really share how I feel or even whats bothering me. I want to give in detail why I haven't written in so long, or even wanted to make a video or really anything at all even.

Lets get this started:

           To be Honest being a mum can wear you right out especially if you are a stay at home mom, whom barely leave the house without her family. I wouldn't trade this for the world, but people need to understand that most of the time I really don't feel like doing anything because I've been up early. My daughter gets up between seven and eight thirty every morning, most days so full of energy i don't even know how to deal with it until I've had a cup of coffee. 

           From the moment she wakes up until she takes a nap that day she is on the go, and so am I. She will play in her room or like some days will follow me around the house while i'm trying to clean the bathroom. I love being a stay at home mom, but sometimes you just want time to read a book, or write on your blog. Honestly it wasn't till now that I've wanted to write anything because i just didn't have time.

           I love being a mum, but I want to be that mum that my children look up to so i want to be more. So with all the craziness going on a vow that I'm going to take more time for myself, but I also want to post more family activities as well because that's my whole world. I wouldn't trade a moment of it.

Reason number two:

            I've had a series of what I would call tragedies happen in this last year. I've had friendships lost, family pass, and just bad cases of luck. These are the things that we can't always control. and I wanted to write about these because they have had a pretty big impact on my life this year. This is a big factor of why I haven't really wanted to put my life out there for EVERYONE to read, but honestly I'm okay with it at this point.

            Friendships I can't say we have all had similar experiences, but for those that have you'll know what I'm talking about. So you have that one friend who's on again off again, sometimes you can do nothing but make them happy then there are times there is NOTHING you can do. Well, I've had that experience and it's hard because they have been one of your longest friends/ I was told when i was younger that friends would always be there, but i was also taught that not everyone is meant to stay in your life. Both are true, I'm not really friends but I don't hate this person. It did hurt when I broke it off, and I cant tell you if it was a good idea or not but for now it's what I need.

              

          Family passing, this is a big one and it is still fresh but I want to put it on here. I recently lost my cousin kevin whom has been there for me since we were kids, he always knew the right things to say. He was always the one with the best advice, someone I could relate with on just about everything. No one was a close to me like that, and losing him this year has taken a huge toll on me, but the last week I've done some soul searching. I've been thinking about all that advice Kevin had taught me, and now I think it's time to do what I think he would approve of. 

           I'm going to live my life, I'm not going to be scared, I'm not going to hold back, and I'm going to do the things I want to do in life. YOLO= You only live once. Kevin loved this saying because it was brought to life by a singer we both loved *Mitch Luker* Kevin always lived doing what he loved even until the end, and you know what It's time to do the same.

    The last point here is everyone gets stuck with those "bad" luck days where it seems like everything that can go wrong is going to go wrong. This is how September has felt. just like everything I did was wrong. It felt like I'd get ahead and be pushed back further than where i started. I don't feel that way so much, i don't feel as stressed about life because it's calming down. It's quiet, I can think again.

      I was sad, I was depressed, and to be honest maybe a little mean or distant from others. Sometimes when things go wrong I just want to give up because I feel like I'm just going to keep being beaten down. September was a horror of a month for me, but I want to turn everything around this month and make it better. I want to do things, i want to express myself, I don't want to be scared of others thoughts about me. I just want to me.

To conclude this post:

          So this is whats been going on in my life, this about sums up the big parts that happened. So this is me vowing to all of you on my personal blog, I want to be more active and more social. I want to express myself, I want to live my life to the fullest. I promise to blog more, to post more videos, and just try to be there more for people. I also have some ideas That I'm going to post in another blog, but we will save that for another time.

   I didn't want to leave you guys in the dark, and maybe you could see where I'm coming from because it really didn't feel like my thoughts, dreams, and even life mattered to anyone. Even if no one reads this, I'll still feel okay because I've found a way to open myself up anyways. 

Thank you for listening.

Xo- Courtney H.

               

Ipsy Glambags

     So about three months ago I took the plunge into the world of ipsy, and I can't say I'm disappointed so far I've loved them all for certain products. In this post I'm going to share my bags from June,July and August. I hope you guys enjoy this, and I think I'm going to start making this a monthly post. I also have shared these on my Instagram,YouTube, and Twitter so make sure to follow me on there for more.

    

                                                         June Ipsy Glambag

                         

     This is the first ipsy bag I received, I love the rebel theme with the graffiti bag. The products were all awesome in this bag, this one I actually loved everything out of it. The only bad think is my bronzer, and eyeshadow broke but that's okay.

                                                Products received 

                                            Urban decay eyeshadow 

                                             Crown cosmetics bronzer 

                                            Facial scrub

                                              Jessie girl mint colored nail polish

                                            Emerald green felt tip eyeliner

                                                               July Ipsy Glambag

                            

            The July Ipsy Glambag I was a little less excited about, but I thought the bag was really. lol with the like holographic shine and the beach umbrellas. There was only like two things I was super excited to get I. This and it was the brush and primer. I love both these products a lot, but the more I've used out out this the more I love them.

                                                     Products received 

                                                  Befine night cream

                                                Synthetic blending brush

                                                 Model co waterline eyeliner

                                               Too faced hangover ex primer

                                     Meet matte trimony the balm purple eye shadow

                                                      August Ipsy Glambag

                                

         The August ipsy Glambag I was the most excited for because it was a pastel theme, and if anyone knows be I like pastel things.i was super excited for all these products including the beauty blender even though this is my second black one, but that's fine. I'm excited mostly for the wipes and lip creme.

                                               Products received

                                           Black beauty blender

                                        Tarte lip creme

                                           Nomad eyeshadow 

                                        Mongongo Chapstick

                                   Symphony cucumber and aloe Vera face wipes                  

      I'm going to get more detailed with these, along with trying to make better videos so please bare with me. Also please give feedback I love to hear from you all. Have a beautiful day, and stay classy my friends.

                     -Courtney (Lady Chaos 💀💋)

     

     

Rise above fest 2016

         So as you guys know I'm a full time mom, a part time worker, and a soon to be college student. So, this means I usually don't have time to enjoy a little me time or doing much fun, but in this case I got to see some of my favorites in my own state. When I heard who was coming near us, I looked at my hubby and said we need to go this is a great opportunity to see some of the music we grew up on and some new faces.

      I ordered our tickets four months in advance because who knows we may not have the time to do it later down the road, and I'm so glad I did. We had a blast even though there was a little rain it wasn't going to stop us from having fun. We got there early and stayed the whole time, and had a great time just the two of us. We met some awesome new people, and this is why I enjoy going to music fest instead of a concert with one or two bands playing.

                                       

           Iprevail in Bangor,Maine on August 6th. I first heard of these guys on YouTube because they did a cover of Taylor swifts blank space, but seeing them live made it so much better. They were awesome live and I'm really picky about my bands, if they don't sound as good live as they do on album but these guys killed it. They were pretty personable with their crowd, and their performance was awesome. Beyond just seeing thrm I've been tweeting pictures, and even got a direct message from thr bands Twitter which I'm going to share below. I give these guys so much credit for being the real champs.

This is the messages I've currently received from Iprevail, thank you guys for reaching out and listening to what I had to say, you're the real champs, stay classy my fiends.

    The next band I have extreme appreciation for is BearTooth, I actually didn't know much about this band until a year or so ago. My younger brother had asked me if I knew who they were,which I didn't he showed me their song in between. I instantly fell inlove with the lyrics and couldn't stop listening to them, I'm a little sad I didn't get many pictures of these guys but their performance made up for that.

    I hope to see these guys again because they were amazing, and thy really knew how to put on a show. Keep on rocking on guys, and always keep your head up because you're going places.

   

     I got to see one of my all time favorite bands since high school We Came As Romans, these guys have been a big part of my life and their music has helped me a lot. It was awesome to be so close to them in my home state.I was in literal arms reach of this band, and had made contact with them several times, I'm so over joyed that I could see a super inspiring band like this, and I'm glad I got the opportunity to enjoy their music live.

     This band has been around for as long as I've been alive, a whole 22 years. HateBreed, even though I've only heard very few of their songs they still put on a killer show. We weren't super close to them, but even for as close as we were we got to enjoy some awesome music. I also got so amazing pictures for not being that close. I'm glad I got to witness the performance of a band that's been around as long as they have and get to tell about it.

      I hope to be able to see these guys again, they're one of the best shows I've seen in a while. It also shows with dedication and perseverance you can accomplish your dream. Keep on rocking do know you have fans even in the smallest of states.

  

    The most exciting one ou of all is a band I grew up listening to all the way through high school, this is one band both my hubby and I were super excited to see. Killswitch Engage. I listened to so many of their songs with and without Jesse, but I have to say I'm glad I got to see Jesse perform. It was amazing we were front row and arms reach away from him. 

     The weather had help up all day, but jesse did holy diver as their closing song, and as soon as he was almost done it started raining. It was amazing and such an epic way to nd the set, even though it ended up closing the venue for like half an hour. Despite the storm everything opened up for the second half.

     There were many bands I wasn't able to get photos of sadly because my phone had died, yes these pictures are from my phone and I'm rather proud of how they came out. I want to talk a little about th ands I didn't get photos of because they are just as important as the ones I did. Some of the other bands we saw were Memphis May Fire, alter bridge,seether,volbeat, and disturbed.

    Memphis May Fire played my all time favorite song no ordinary love, which I've loved for a long time so being able to see it made my day ten times better because I wasn't expecting to hear it. Alter bridge I only knew a few songs because I hadn't listened to them much, but they did pretty well so it was an experience in itself to see them.

      As for volbeat,seether, and disturbed they have always been some of my favorites seether mostly played older stuff that everyone knew so that was pretty amazing. As for volbeat and disturbed they both did a wonderful mixtures of old and new, and it was wonderful how the crowd was so interactive with both bands. I had wanted to see volbeat since the year I found out I as pregnant with my daughter so he. I found out they were coming closer I seized the opportunity. Disturbed I had wanted to see for years because I grew up listen into them as a kid with my parents, so their music was like a classic thing in my life. The best moment of th whole night was hearing disturbed play the sound of silence which is be of my all time favorite songs right now, and he rocked it I was super impressed with the set.they had a piano and live instruments,and the backdrop was brilliant.

      Over all this was one of the best festivals I have been to in a long time, I will definitely be going to another rise above again. Also our state was one of the highest numbered of people and money they had seen on the whole tour so that right there is fling me that they're doing something right. I'm hoping to go again next year and get more pictures, and hear more from wonderful bands. I apologize in advance for how long this post is, but I really wanted to share my experience with you guys. Feel free to comment on this, and if you would like to see more stuff like this let me know. I finally have time to write again, and I'll be posting more often so keep an eye out.

           Have a wonderful day, and if you have any good festival things to share I'm more then Illini to hear your experiences.

              -Courtney (Lady Chaos 💀💋)

I'm Back (why I've been on hiatus)

Hello Everyone,

I know I've been gone for months without any explanation, well I'm back now and here to tell you why I was gone for so long. I was pregnant with my now 3 week old daughter, and moved into an apartment with no internet. 

I found out I was pregnant during the summer while I started blogging, and was really excited to start something new on top of doing my photography page. When I found out I was pregnant my whole world was turned up side down, and the majority of my time was taken up by ob appointments and days filled with long naps. I wouldn't change it for the world though because now I have a beautiful and healthy baby girl.

So now that I've given a little bit of the back story of why I was gone I would like to introduce my beautiful baby girl with everyone that reads this blog.

Chelsea Rose

Chelsea Rose was born on March 17,2015 

This was six days past my due date she was 6lbs 80z, and 19 1/2 inches long.

 I was in actual labor for like four days straight but had no progress, it was the 17 and I couldn't breathe I hadn't slept good for like four days because of contractions. I was just ready to have my baby out and in my arms already. I tried taking a shower to see if that controlled the pain, but it didn't that's when I had a enough and had my husband call the hospital.

They had me come in and come to find out I had made some progress since the night before so they decided that they were going to keep me. They gave me some meds to help me sleep, and when I woke up they said it was almost time to have my baby. My Progression was that fast, and it only took twenty minutes and my precious little angle was in the world. 

Honestly the birthing of having a baby was NOTHING compared to the contractions that happen first. I would do it all again, but NOT anytime soon, we want to have a couple years in between children that way we can enjoy her first before introducing another.

Thanks everyone for the understanding, and this is me saying that I'm back and ready to blog again.

Also I would love some input about what you guys would like to hear about on this blog because as it stands it pretty much is just an open blog about anything. I hope you all are having a wonderful night/day where ever you are, and that you enjoy the time with your friends and family because they're very dear and special.

-Courtney <3

All You Need Is Love

Hello Guys and Gals sorry I haven't been posting a whole lot lately!

I've has a lot of exciting things going on as of late. Though I do have a new set of photo shoot pictures to share with you guys. A friend reach out to me a month ago asking if I would do some anniversary photos for her and her boyfriend, and of course I took it! This couple is such a lovely couple and I just had to share the results with you guys.

 



 I have to say both locations were perfect and the time of day this was taken was fantastic, these two are the definition of love! You can almost feel how in love they are when you look at these photos.

 

All you need is love, honesty and trust! I hope these too always remember this, and are happy like this the rest of their lives. I can't wait to do more photo shoot with these to because I was so much fun and they really are the perfect photo/couple I know.

I hope you always tell the person you love how much they mean to you, and smile, share a laugh, and just enjoy each others company because that person could become your whole world.

- Love Lady Chaos (Courtney)

Wedding by the sea

So I recently got to photograph a wedding, but this wasn't just any wedding! 

I got to photograph the wedding of the woman whom is like my other mother.

Everything about this wedding was beautiful location, dresses, and most importantly the bride.

Of course there was a wonderful reception after this beautiful seaside wedding.

So much food, and fun for all and a beautiful wedding cake.

 I hope to have more opportunitys like this to photograph wonderful memories, and to capture the true love of two people. Congratz again you guys, and I hope you may always be as happy as you were the day you got married. 

Love-Lady Chaos(Courtney)

Girly/Fancy Plugs (Etsy Picks/input?)

Hey Loves,

So lately I've been wanting to update my body Jewelry collection,and I think I'm going to start with my plugs.

I usually buy whatever ones I like in the mall stores, but I really wanted to brand out and get something more girly/fancy. These are the four choices I found that I really like, but the hard part is picking a single pair not all four. I would love some input from you lovely's, which one's do you think are the best/cutest!

Also what fun Jewelry have you or do you want to update your Jewelry collection? Also what are your feeling on Body Mod's? What Body Mods do you currently have?

Have a wonderful day/Night wherever you may be!

-Love,

Lady Chaos(Courtney)